during icamp and good friday a few years back, pastor victor and another chinese pastor gave me the same verse from the Lord, psalm 23. particularly psalm 23:1 "the Lord is my shepard, i shall not be in want". i never understood what it meant and why it applied to me. and i just googled it and got this off the net:

What exactly does that mean, "I shall not want"? The meaning here is not that we won't desire or want anything, the meaning is that we won't be left wanting. We are being told that the Lord's sheep are not lacking anything.

But how is this true? We don't even have to leave Psalm 23 to see that the Lord's sheep do indeed lack things. When we are told about walking through the dark valley it is safe to assume that the valley lacks light, and I presume it lacks the green pasture and the quiet waters.

In what sense then, can it be said that the Christian shall not lack anything? I like John Piper's answer to this question, "what David means is that God's sheep never lack anything that the Shepherd thinks is good for them."

What this means is that God is all we need. What this means is that Jesus is enough. Whether we are in the green pasture or the dark valley, the Shepherd remains at our side and that is what we need. If we have Jesus, we lack no good thing.

Lord i won't worry about tomorrow, i'm giving you my fears and sorrows, where you lead me i will follow.. trusting in what you say.. today is the day :)

quickie

just a quick update cause i know i have left this space hanging..

hmmm. prelims start this week! which means mugging should commence like now..

next week's september hols will be mugging every single day man, morning to night.

esp. for chemistry, my one enemy, a enemy that makes chinese seem okay.

ah i hope i'll manage to conquer it for Os, i hate chemistry man.

i keep falling asleep during emath class cause sometimes emath seems just too simple and downright boring. but emath prelims are this week ):

i watched angus thongs and perfect snogging for the third time and i still love it :)

more like i'm in love with the lead character's best friend jas. haha, nah i love the movie. no srsly the girl's amazingly pretty (L)

last week there was no youth service, feels really weirddd.

but on saturday i had swensons dinner with my mum and sister which was really good.

i'm always so tired.

trying to make sense of how to carry on.

it's the same old same old..

tmr's teachers day and i bought cupcakes and put them with ferrero roches for my teachers, last teacher's day in kcp..

btw the radio has been playing really good music (Y)

why won't you answer me? this silence is slowly killing me.. - maroon 5 puts it simply.

i wrote two hundred letters i will never send

as a result of inadequate sleep, i sometimes feel i have lost my zest in life.

simply cause i get cranky and feeling tired throughout the day but still dragging myself around..

so tired that i feel half dead on the mrt train ride home even when i'm laughing with sharmala & thessa.

oh yeah naomi, thessa and i ate at pastamania today and thessa 'stole' a penne (a kind of pasta) off the counter and she gave it to me as a gift. and then she asked me if she could have it back. pffttt. haha.. but yeah i kept it.

it looks like this.

'misery' by maroon 5 played on the radio twice today and sharmala and i broke out in passionate soulful singing. oh yeah.. (Y)

YOG ended today. i guess that's somewhat worth mentioning..

and elroy claims i stalked him just cause i like his video post the moment he posted it. hellooo, facebook's efficient and i get accused as a result of it? haha, anyway imma post it here.

i know joanne can play this on the piano. well, she can play anything you sing to her on the piano..

i don't study hard enough, going to acjc won't be that easy.. c'mon sarah study harder..

i think with prelims coming up i'll go into mugging mode soon enough.

(i hope this talking to myself thing doesn't come off as loser-ish.. haha)

life's too short

sorry i haven't been updating, life is busy..

btw dinner just now was awesome shitzzz. the epitome of unhealthy stuff:

fried calamari rings, microwave pizza, some thinner form of prata eaten with curry chicken leftover from sunday but still omg soo good :)

just like how my school's canteen announces, wednesday is fried food day and today my meals are guilty of abiding by this. a contrasting fact: i just finished eating a banana, hey, it's healthy (Y)

hmmm. let's see.. chemistry test on tuesday totally screwed up my sleep.

i stayed up on monday till 12.30 am (desperate times called for desperate measures. i guess this is what people would seem as mugging) and for me, it's like i can't fall asleep immediately plus time needed for brushing teeth etc.. i end up sleeping at 1 am+?

so i was reallyyy tired on tuesday and tuesday is long ass day cause i have science srp and math night study. i fell asleep for like 15 minutes in chem srp and esther was kind enough to agree to help me copy the chem stuff into my book. (love you for that and many other reasons..)

dinner and night study with joanne, keanna, rachel & hazel again.

and after that i went home by mrt! at like 8.30 at night i took the 1 hour journey home.

i didn't mind really, initally i was supposed to cab home but the line at the taxi stand was so long.

my ipod kept me company (thumbs up for awesome music) as well as the night scenery. i like that :)

today after school everyone was in a martial arts phase.

it all started when i decided to play my friend's psp, the kind of fighting games where if you lose it goes "K.O".. omg i was so enthusiastic cause i could anyhow press buttons and win by kicking the crap out of the other player (which was interchangeably esther and vito and james)

and li an even asked me "you very excited huh?" yes verrryyy.

cause psps can actually bluetooth to another one (i don't know if you knew that, i didn't) and you can have matches :D

after that we were like all trying out punches and kicks and stuff (not as lame or violent as it sounds i swear), zhenghao let us punch his hands and stuff and we all just spent the half an hour like that. very fun srsly..

and after school i went to macs with wenhui, erina & keanna and we all shared this nugget meal and wenhui says i should go treasure hunting at her house some time..

ah life's too short! there's so little time left before my secondary sch life is over ))))):

and prelims are next week!

o levels are in exactly, yes you heard me right, EXACTLY two months.

dude... do something with your life..

imma do chem now, so cya thanks for reading..

add a little colour to your life :)

random

i've decided that i AM a generally happy person who just wants things to fall into place all the time.

nothing wrong with that :)

it's called having high expectations i guess..

and as life goes on, i'll be learning to accept how life turns out.

and after amath tuition i feel smarter, haha.

i think exam anxiety gets to me..

and i would say eating really makes me happy..

only i really gotta control how much i eat cause we all know what happens when we overindulge.

just a random blog post :)

perspective

I have a friend who inspires me.. the way she writes. the way she presents her thoughts.

just reading what she writes gives me a new perspective.

not exactly a positive everything-is-happy sunshine one but a realistic and honest one.

it's just interesting to hear (or rather read) what she has to say.

not anyone you would know i think..

you know sometimes i wonder if i'm meant to have a simplistic mind, always happy and assuming the best.. or if i'm supposed to be thinking more.. that maybe there's a reason why sometimes things don't fall into place perfectly like i would hope.

maybe cause there simply is no perfect.

do i accept the fact readily or do i hope for it to happen in the closest way possible, settling for whatever comes close. i would say i've been living by the latter.

sometimes i feel so drained..

and the constant haunting that the O levels are coming do me no good.

makes me feel life will have to revolve around that thought till it's over.

and it's a dry life.

tuition in like 15 minutes. i hope i do not get yelled at by my tuition teacher.

and hopefully i'll reach an A2 or B3 for prelims 2 for amath, it annoys me that i spend so much time on it but it still isn't one of my best subjects.

DAVID CHOI !

omg my what started off as a boring day got soooooo interesting and awesome at the end! :)

we had planned this but this morning naomi told me that she didn't want to go and at like 5 naomi called me and said that she decided we should totally go to see...

DAVID CHOI!

in case you don't know who he is.. he's an american-asian singer who is famous on youtube and is an awesome singer! :D

i met naomi for dinner at kfc (it was sooo good) and sharmala joined us later on and we went and queued up behind a longggggg line of people into HMV - the cd store where the autograph session was held.

initially there was a lady insisting that we have to get the CD if not we won't get the autograph.. but we didn't wanna purchase it and we continued queuing anyway..

as we got closer another staff told us that david choi had to leave by 9 and he would only sign CDs.. so we decided to write a note to him as i printed our his picture.. watch the process here:

(yes i actually documented the thing, watch for 5 mins and you'll get to experience what we went through)

fast forward to the 4:30 for the moment we met him :D

apparently he DID sign autographs for us and gave us high fives. he is tooo cool and it was so damn awesome! he's like an internationally-known singer and it's so awesome that we got to see him.

is life exciting or what?!(hope you watched the full video, it'll be cool if you did)

had a great night with naomi & sharmala! and it was so last minute, the whole arrangement and everything..

i shall end this blog post with his music..

we really are only young once. it's days like these where i feel like i embrace my youth - the feeling of excitement, thrilling experiences and just having fun! :)

Thankful

English oral went really well! :)

i was like ecstatically happy cause..

1) the examiners were so kind, friendly and engaging!

when one of them said my name they were like "oh sarah leong, sounds familiar. what primary sch were you from?"

Me: "CHIJ"

Other examiner: "oh then your english must be fantastic!"

that kind boosted my confidence alrd and they actually laughed along with me and asked if rachel leong was my sister cause rachel was after me, LOL.

2) they went "good" after my reading, "good, sarah. good" after my convo when it ended with just two questions i went..

Me: "that's it?"

Examiner: "yeah, you were actually the best so far"

Me (in my head and not out loud) : omg that's awesome

what really came out of my mouth: "really? thank you!!" *smiles and walks off*

3) my convo was actually really good.

first question: tell me about a time when you failed to complete a task on time.

i made up some story and it worked! i also managed to talk comically with drama and of course good english

second question: has technology made reading redundant?

i had kinda lots to say and i even made a reference to the ipad :D haha.

so life's good. everything went swell, almost perfect! i had a good dinner and caught the bus home on time too. ah awesomeness.

oh yeah i took the mrt home with murphy who gets off like a few stops before me cause we both live ridiculously far from sch.

we talked and played tap tap to coldplay songs, mainly 'fix you' and 'yellow'. way awesome!

when i first saw this pic i was like "omg who doesn't love zooey deshannel?!" then i pondered "or wait is that katy perry?" *thinks* "nah zooey deshannel, i'm sure now i can tell the difference". haha, katy and zooey look so alike!

thank God for an awesome day and gracious examiners! :)

The Verdict

ah chinese o level results were released today!

i felt like i went to school for the sole purpose of getting my results, it felt like forever before 11.30am came..

and i attained a B3.. distinction for my oral & listening comprehension.

damn. my paper 1 and 2 must have sucked.

i'm actually contented and so thankful that i didn't get B4..

but since i got a distinction for the components that cannot be retaken, then should i retake paper 1 and 2 again? ah i sooo don't want to do another zuo wen, it's like a crazy phobia or something..

i feel really uneasy about this cause if i end up taking again and i get the same grade, it'll sorta be very depressing and a waste of time.. but then again a second chance why not? but then again again.. higher chinese pupils will be taking with us. damn..

i'm not even some A for chinese student in the first place right..

ah i swear a lotttt of people got B3.

anyway.. on a lighter note..

night study yesterday was enjoyable :D

hung out with quite a lot of people: rachel, joanne, erina, hazel and keanna.

and i had dinner beforehand :)

erina was so funny, she came and she threw us yupi kisses gummies at us like it was christmas. haha, very sweet. (pun intended) she was like santa claus.

and i practiced my oral again with ms wong.

which reminds me.. tmr is my o level english oral, wish me luck! :)

ah i'm so scared that my o level results for my other subjects next year in january will be as half-baked like my chinese results..

PRELIMS IN LIKE ONE AND A HALF WEEKS. wait what?? ah. study hard sarah, this year determines your life.. well sorta..

some people look like they have everything going on for them..

the need to succeed.

exhausted

my title says it all. i'm reallyyy tired when i come home from sch at like, maybe cause of the one hour trip home or just sch in general..

had practice english oral today, it went well :)
hopefully the real one will turn out just as good.

TWO DAYS TO CHINESE O LEVEL RESULTS.
when i wake up tmr i can officially go "omg tmr we're getting back chinese o level results!"

btw i'm supposed to be doing an ss essay right now which i personally and honestly think is useless cause it has such a slight chance of coming out for Os.
and i still have to do chem. i don't know what to prioritise, i have a pile of work that continues piling up. (including lit esays!)

night study tmr! joanne and i are having dinner together :)

can't wait for wednesday srsly.. o level results, i really hope you're not gonna be a big disappointment. retaking would take toooo much effort.

sometimes you just get so tired.

when you're too in love to let go

today was kinda tiring cause i was out of the house frm 12.30 all the way till night time.

had a mini cell outing - ice skating!
I haven't skated since i was 6 years old but eventually i managed to get the hang of it.
ryan ngin and i started out fumbling around the skate ring and after today he decided that this was so not his thing, haha.

after that we all got burger king to go and ben drove us to church for youth service.
at the end of youth service i went for altar call and pastor josh came up to me and i liked how he told me to pray for myself when i told him about my desire to hear from God more. after that he prayed for me after i've prayed for myself. God you hear my prayers, help me to live a life that is dependent on you.

sat next to Jemina during service and i love it how she actually misses me even though it's been a week since she last saw me. thankful for friends like her.

and i always have dinner with my old cell, like renhui, brenda, hiang teck, joshua chia, justin, caleb teo and even arie who pops by. and yes seeing amanda later on too. i really miss them.
and it was a lot of laughs playing the 'mrt' game.

events to look forward/dread (it could srsly go either way) :

18th of august, wednesday - CHINESE O LEVEL RESULTS.
19th of august, thursday - ENGLISH O LEVEL ORAL EXAMINATION

and with this upcoming week, it's two weeks to prelims. gotta start commiting all my time to studying. maybe not all but a lot of it.

i listen to your favourite songs to feel closer to you and to relate to you.

High up above or down below
when you're too in love to let it go
But if you never try you'll never know
Just what you're worth

Lights will guide you home
and ignite your bones
And I will try to fix you

OMG SARAH STUDYYYYYYYYYYYYY.
now.....

emath circle properties here i come!

i gotta stop being so distracted. almost feel like the computer's at fault and i'm srsly addicted to it.

ah study sarah, it's the Os year, stop blogging like right now.

OKAY BYE! STUDY!!!

what we have is really magic

i like the weather today :)

normally i wouldn't like the rain cause it makes the day gloomy and it's super unconvenient to travel around.

but today the classroom was so windy and james even got all wet sitting next to the window, haha.

and we have like windmills on each window of our classroom, the windows facing outside i mean.

they were spinning and it looked really pretty.

today was another one of those good school days.

hey how can you not be happy when sch starts on a wednesday! :)

anyway, i have been studying chem & amath, pretty much these two over the long break.

and i only managed to catch bits of the national day parade.

arie and i also helped out for gofest as ushers yesterday and then i had lunch with him and my sister joined us.

sharmala really knows all the songs that i think are new and are currently addicted to.

she's like a walking radio man.

and today was another day filled with laughs with naomi, sharmala, rachel (love seeing her smile!), esther (she's a damn funny best friend). <-laughing not all at the same time btw..

oh yeah and vito was really happy in the morning, nice start to the morning seeing him smile and talk to me while we walk up to the hall.

ah i don't know why i'm going all weird but i would like to call this appreciating the people around you :)

and my sister and i laughed over some line in a movie trailer we watched yesterday and it was epic.

everyone's so annoyed that chinese O levels results arent out yet. news from esther's friend on fb: it's next wednesday. that's like a week from now, WHY DO YOU TORTURE US M.O.E, just release it alrd! ahhhhh. then again this information might be unreliable. this sucks. i've been watching the news on channel 5 for the past 3 days in hopes of the o level results being reported.

and imma say this again: i love lit class. and i feel that it's awesome that through lit class i meet the most awesome people.

btw, before i blogged i just watched the 10th episode of pretty little liars online (i watch it the same week as the US) and my gosh it's freaking scary and thrilling. awesomeness..

and after sch today erina's mum drove wenhui and i to j8 and i saw charlene after so long! (L)

and before that wenhui was trying to pronounce "beach" in proper english but it just kept coming out as bitch, LOL. and her english o level oral is on friday. i'll laugh my ass off if the word 'beach' comes out in the reading passage..

okay i need to study electrolysis for tmr's test. yikes.

imma get your heart racing, be your teenage dream tonight.

I've found you

this pic totally fits what happened to me..

it's been like ten years.

(and only old people talk like that man)

ah surprises in life. talking to a friend again after 10 years.

you'll be gone and i'll be happier.

hello long weekend (:

ah national day is like tomorrow, the year's going by already.

anyway yesterday i had ushering at church and it was an especially long duty.

and afterward during debrief wenjie gave us each a rose-shaped brownie.

now that's a first! nah not wenjie giving us stuff, she does quite often.

the rose-shaped brownie! so pretty and tasted so good.

and after not seeing my church friends for like half a month, felt good to see them again :)

amath pisses me off sometimes, okay maybe not.

it just makes me feel dumb and weak.

esp with my suddenly-turned-angry tuition teacher making me think independently which puts me in a very pressured position.

on a random note, gummies are really yum. my mum just got some & they have some nice fruit juice in it.

i really liked yesterday's sermon in church.

ah my random thoughts.

history revision time soon!

take some time to think about stuff.

Red & White

okay highlight of yesterday:

I have my prom dress hanging in my closet like right now.

yes i bought it alrd :D

and yes i have to wait three months to wear it.

so yesterday was my last national day in kcp.

no lessons at all which was (Y) and we had the celebrations in the hall.

my class wore our class tee which was white.

sec 4 students got to sit on the retractable seats which is kinda like those seats at basketball games that are on platforms. i have no idea why my sch spends money on such stuff.

overall it was kinda half really lame and half really fun.

i love mr brian koh's ndp quiz man, best part of the whole thing.

and the last part with the video shown accompanied with the song "home" by kit chan,

my class was the most enthu man.

we were seated right at the top row of the retractable seats and we were all swaying our hands and we were the only class doing that in the entire sch.

ah we're awesome. there's power in numbers :)

after everything ended at like 10.45, i did some sch work (urgh) and then hung out with like a lot of people at food junction and had lunch.

afterward it was just naomi, sharmala, eileen and i were at orchard for 5 hours going prom dress shopping. my gosh we went to soooo many dress shops/retail stores.

the initial plan was to get sharmala a prom dress, the rest of us were just tagging along..

sharmala, eileen and i did try some dresses on, naomi ended up buying a super awesome shirt from gap kids. (like random man)

halfway in this five hours naomi had to go the dentist and so eileen, sharmala and i went to starbucks and the samples we were given for some heavenly berry cake drew us into starbucks.

so we spent some time in the cosy environment of starbucks and had A LOT of laughs.

ah awesome stuff.. awesome-ass starbucks moments (L)

at the end of the day, i was contemplating whether i should get the dress i saw earlier cause everyone said the dress suited me.

in the end i did! sharmala lent me her dress money instead and i got my dress.

omg thank you (:

so if you were wondering.. my dress is from zara :D

it's too awesome for words.

okay today i have to wear red & white for ushering at youth service too.

and i have tuition in about an hour ):

okay rmbr study study study!

uplifted

just talking to you for awhile makes me so happy, it lifts my spirits :)

i'm doing some english compre hw now and it's alrd 10.30. urgh..
summary is gonna take for.ever...

anyway night study today for chem!
hung out with manju for dinner at subway before heading to sch.
such good food (Y)
and night study is pretty tiring, maybe cause the day is long alrd.

and before that in the afternoon i had aces in math class and i sat with sarah ng and she's awesome. i love this math support group thingy, i'm motivated, i answer questions faster and i'm around smart people who can help me :)

tmr's national day celebration! sch ends at 10.30.

naomi and i will continue our 'tradition' for the second year: red ribbons on our ponytails :)
i can't believe it's been a year since our last national day and we actually went to spotlight last year just to get red and white ribbons.
i love you naomi.

and today vito asked in math class is 6 is an odd number, LOLOLOLOLLL.

okay life just got better, talking to you really made all the difference man..
even though you'll never see this.

okay BYE PEOPLE!

PS. i have double eye bags now just like eunice tay, oh no ):
proves i get no sleep.

Trying to make a move just to stay in the game

ah sorry for the lack of updates! my internet was down for two days.

let's see what's going on with life..

generally i feel happy this week, that's a really good thing :)

had my two science practical examination theory o level exam on monday for chem and bio today.

i actually mug for them, memorising all the experiments, variables, procedure etc.

i guess hard work pays off, both of them went well :)

i feel like i have nothing to say today besides narrating my days.

oh yeah prelims 2 timetable is out.

it's really gonna be studying all the way to Os.

it's exciting yet intimidating and very terrifying that it's coming closer and closer to Os.

funny moment today:

my class' recess was really early today and i had free period later on so i didnt wanna go eat recess so i asked vito to get me wantons but he didnt >:\ so anyway i thought esther didn't get any wantons for me either so like 2 minutes to the end of recess i decided i'm just gonna go get them myself and i got james tanjaya to go with me.

and i realised we had no time so i suggested we ran and we really did and someone from downstairs was like "hey look it's james tanjaya and sarah running" LOL. i didnt realise how funny we looked jogging in sync to the canteen.

ah well it's funny to me :)

and i like literature lessons.

i realise if you laugh a lot your day will seem like a good one :)

you don't know how lovely you are

Hey yesterday was a day of non-stop activity and moving around!

woke up so early to go for the SAJC open house.

got to talk to a student there who was from chij st. nick's and she told me about H2 lit.

basically the whole open house was cca booths and they even had some tiger mascot walking around, haha.

yes and i saw andrea there!

there were quite a lot of kcp people who went.

posse clique! (: love this picture

dear wenhui

rachel darling.

afterward headed off to orchard shaw lido for lunch and a movie with the normal lit class/fat ass group.

and joanne and i were brilliant enought to find us seats at the eating area side-by-side :)

we watched "inception". boy was it confusing! pretty good storyline, freaky at some parts.

but overall not completely understood.

and after the movie i had to like rush like crazy to buona vista cause ben would pick ryan, joel and i from there.

well, i ended up being slightly late despite rushing ):

we then went for latong laksa and samuel and crystella were there alrd.

i do not, actually do not at all eat laksa. but i have to admit it was good (Y)

i'm thinking katong laksa is famous right? (i swear sometimes i'm not singaporean enough)

afterward ben drove us to acs(I) to watch their drama production.

omg it was so entertaining! makes me sooo wanna join drama club in jc. it was funny and enjoyable, the audience kept laughing along and the props were great (Y)

during the intermission sarah cheong kinda showed me around. damn acs(I) has such a nice school building! it's amazing there! ryan ngin and i were like "ah if only our sch was like that, we would be able to study so much better"

and then the second drama performance we saw natalie, one of our cell members, performing on stage too :) and yes, the second performance was also very funny :)

had such a good time at acs(I), awesome stuff..

and i'm really happy i got to talk to you again :)

sometimes i think i lead a mediocre life. Os in 84 days, i have to do something about that!

tuition today, amath for two hours. c'mon focussssss.

like what i saw on sarah cheong's note on her handphone screen yesterday:

live for your future.